Dear Friends:
I still can't believe it's done. :-) There were so many times I wondered if I'd ever be able to complete The Heart of a Father. I was so picky! I could have finished it dozens of times, but it never felt right. It seemed to be lacking something. So I held on and held off on publishing it.
I'm so glad I did.
Now it feels right! It looks right! It IS right! :-) Thanks, Dad! Without Dad, I'd still be wondering if I will ever finish the book! He was the key ingredient to me finding a way to finish the book.
I've been receiving emails from contributors and readers who are very happy with the book. It's not an easy read. Neither was The Heart of a Mother. These books are not books read for pleasure. They're read for comfort, for education and for inspiration, but not for pleasure. Reliving the times in the hospital or difficult times in our marriages due to the stress of dealing with a sick child on top of everything else -- those things aren't easy to read. But the most amazing thing happens when I write about my experiences or read the experiences of others. I feel a kinship, a connection, that I don't feel with anyone else. Instead of feeling isolated and bereft, I realize I belong to a very special group of warriors. This sense of belonging makes me stronger. It makes me actually feel capable.
Ironically, when I was in that situation (at the hospital mainly), I felt anything but capable. When Alex was in the hospital, I felt like a zombie. I couldn't remember anything. I felt so useless and ineffective. It was awful! That's why I couldn't wait until the catheter was taken out and I could change diapers, when the wounds healed enough that I could bathe Alex and when he was off the ventilator and I could feed my baby. Until I could be the hands-on mom I was used to being, I was a wreck. I hated for anyone to ask me how I was doing. I was fine as long as no one asked me that. I had a mask of composure that I was able to wear, but for some reason, when someone said, "Wow! You really seem to be holding up well!" or "How are you doing?" That's when the mask would slip and the tears would fill my eyes. I wasn't doing well; I was in agony. My baby was sick and I felt powerless to do anything about it.
Most days, I don't even think about those times. I'm raising a teenager. Oh yeah, he was born with a heart defect. Alex's heart defect is always there and I'm the mom who asks if meds have been taken and teeth brushed everyday, but I don't stress over Alex's heart defect anymore. I wondered, when we were in the throes of dealing with his condition, if I would ever have a morning where I didn't wake up and rush to his bedside afraid he might not be with me anymore. Would I ever go to sleep without thanking God for having one more day with my children and without tears accompanying my dreams?
The answer to both questions is "yes." I've had many days where I hardly think about Alex's heart defect. We're too busy with swim meets, robotic tournaments, Boy Scouts, Tae Kwon Do, art lessons, piano lessons. Yes. There were days that I just tumbled into bed too exhausted to worry about Alex. Too happy to let those thoughts infiltrate my mind. The days have come and I hope there will be many more.
The book is done. :-) Dads now have a say! Dads now have a voice! :-) The moms have told their stories and the dads have told their stories. Some of the men who wrote are husbands to the women who wrote for The Heart of a Mother, so some readers will have a chance to see how the children they read about are doing 10 years later. That was exciting for me. To watch these young heart heroes grow up and realize their potential. Wow. Those stories empower me. They give me hope that Alex will beat the odds and grow up to live a full life, too. I think all of us heart parents need that thread of hope.
We've done three book signings -- one in Austin, Waco and Killeen, Texas. We have two more scheduled for July -- one in Georgetown and one in San Antonio. If anyone else would like a book signing, please let me know. We've had two television interviews -- one with Dad and me in Austin and one with Jess McCain in Sacramento. Dad did an interview for the radio in Austin. A wonderful newspaper article has been written about David Nowell. It's been a busy time.
For the latest updates and links to television interviews and newspaper articles, check out our websites: www.heartfather.com or www.babyheartspress.com.
Have a great day!
Anna
Showing posts with label The Heart of a Father. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Heart of a Father. Show all posts
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Literary Festival
Yesterday Alexander and I attended a Literary Festival at Harmony School in Pflugerville, Texas. Lora Negrito had invited members of the Writer's League of Texas to attend and she was delighted when I responded, especially since I told her that Alex is also a published writer. She had tables for each of us.
Here is Alex's table:
We had the Highlights for Children and Disney Magazines that Alex had been published in to show the children that there are opportunities for children to publish, too. We forgot to bring Alex newspaper articles! Alex really wished he had brought the first few chapters of his book, too. He actually had two students very interested in his story line. He has some students who are going to check out his www.fanfiction chapters. He doesn't use his real name on the Fan Fiction site, so he had to tell the boys the name to look for to find his stories.
Here I am at my table:
It was really great that I had the galley/proof of The Heart of a Father. You can see it here next to The Heart of a Mother. The cover is really quite striking. Of course, the book the kids were most interested in was My Brother Needs an Operation. I had fun telling them the story of how K.C., my toy poodle, had managed to get in so many photographs, that Linda Ball (the illustrator) decided to work her into the story line.
As much as I enjoyed talking to the students -- and 4 or 5 of them had siblings with CHDs! -- I think I enjoyed even more seeing Alex talk with the students about his writing projects and achievements.
The school has about 150 students. They had the students come to us by grade (6th - 9th) a little at a time. There were several other authors' tables not visible in this photograph which is why it doesn't look like there are many people here. There were. The children split up and spoke to all of the different authors in the different sections of this room. Unfortunately, the photos of the other authors I took came out way too dark for me to post.
I think one of the things that I got the biggest kick out of was watching some of the students ask Alex for his autograph.
We had lunch with the main speaker for the Literary Festival, Maria Snyder, author of Poison Study, Magic Study, Fire Study, Storm Glass, and (soon to be released) Sea Glass. Unfortunately, the photo I took of Maria Snyder came out too dark. :-( She was extremely personable and very kind to both Alex and me. In fact, she impressed Alex enough with her presentation and luncheon discussion for him to get an autographed copy of her very first book (Poison Study).
Here's a photo of her that I found online:
We had a great time! Thank you to the Harmony School for inviting Alex and me to their Literary Festival and thanks to all the kind people we met yesterday. It really was a most enjoyable day.
Here is Alex's table:
We had the Highlights for Children and Disney Magazines that Alex had been published in to show the children that there are opportunities for children to publish, too. We forgot to bring Alex newspaper articles! Alex really wished he had brought the first few chapters of his book, too. He actually had two students very interested in his story line. He has some students who are going to check out his www.fanfiction chapters. He doesn't use his real name on the Fan Fiction site, so he had to tell the boys the name to look for to find his stories.
Here I am at my table:
It was really great that I had the galley/proof of The Heart of a Father. You can see it here next to The Heart of a Mother. The cover is really quite striking. Of course, the book the kids were most interested in was My Brother Needs an Operation. I had fun telling them the story of how K.C., my toy poodle, had managed to get in so many photographs, that Linda Ball (the illustrator) decided to work her into the story line.
As much as I enjoyed talking to the students -- and 4 or 5 of them had siblings with CHDs! -- I think I enjoyed even more seeing Alex talk with the students about his writing projects and achievements.
The school has about 150 students. They had the students come to us by grade (6th - 9th) a little at a time. There were several other authors' tables not visible in this photograph which is why it doesn't look like there are many people here. There were. The children split up and spoke to all of the different authors in the different sections of this room. Unfortunately, the photos of the other authors I took came out way too dark for me to post.
I think one of the things that I got the biggest kick out of was watching some of the students ask Alex for his autograph.
We had lunch with the main speaker for the Literary Festival, Maria Snyder, author of Poison Study, Magic Study, Fire Study, Storm Glass, and (soon to be released) Sea Glass. Unfortunately, the photo I took of Maria Snyder came out too dark. :-( She was extremely personable and very kind to both Alex and me. In fact, she impressed Alex enough with her presentation and luncheon discussion for him to get an autographed copy of her very first book (Poison Study).
Here's a photo of her that I found online:
We had a great time! Thank you to the Harmony School for inviting Alex and me to their Literary Festival and thanks to all the kind people we met yesterday. It really was a most enjoyable day.
Monday, November 12, 2007
Family Matters & The Heart of a Father Update
Dear Friends of the Heart:
This last week was bittersweet. The bitter came in the form of a phone call at ten minutes 'til one Thursday morning. It was my sister-in-law. My husband's brother, Jack, was in the hospital suffering from a massive heart attack. We didn't know if he'd make it.
By 6:30 a.m. Jack had undergone 2 cardiac caths. He was stabilized and at a different hospital than where he'd started out. Things were looking up for Jack. Frank flew out later Thursday morning to be with him and our sister-in-law Lee.
The sweet part also happened on Thursday. My mother, two aunts and one uncle were visiting my cousin in Waco from Georgia and I was to go to Waco with Alex for lunch. I called to tell them that we'd had hardly any sleep and I was going to be a little bit late. The rest of the late morning and afternoon were spent visiting with my mother, Aunt Guyla, Aunt Paula and Uncle Otis.
Thursday afternoon Alex and I drove back to Temple so we could help out at Joey's swim meet. It was a good meet, although the much bigger team from a much bigger city romped our small team. :-( Still, the kids swam well and made some improvements.
Friday my family came to visit me in Temple. We went to lunch with my father and grandmother. What could have been an awkward event went well. I'm so glad to see my mother and father can be together without animosity. Joey and Megan (my sister's daughter) will be graduating next year and it would be nice if they could both be present for those special occasions.
On Friday night Joey and I left for a swim meet in College Station. This was a huge meet of 499 swimmers from all over (mostly central and south) Texas. Our team only brought 6 boys and 7 girls. Our boys finished 6th beating out much bigger teams! Joey got two best times and his relays helped earn the boys some good points. It was fun to watch Joey and his team do so well. Landry, our only diver, is one of Joey's best friends and I was happy to see him do well in the diving -- especially since this was the first big meet for him to attend and compete in as a diver.
We didn't get home until close to 1 a.m. on Sunday. The weekend was half over. But there was still Robotics to do! The X-Bots came over and worked very hard on their missions for a while before taking a break. During the break I talked to the boys about what they were doing and how to talk to judges about how they were interacting, changing responsibilities for missions, programs and building arms and attachments, and strategizing on the best way for their robot to earn the most points. It was an interesting meeting.
Coach Cristy and I also went over their homework from last week and reminded them about the field trip we're taking on Tuesday to the Families in Crisis center in order to continue working on their community service/robotics project. We got a lot done in 2 hours!
Then it was on to McGregor. This is a small town near Gatesville and not far from Hewitt (where my cousin lives) and Temple (where I live). We went to a restaurant called Luigi's which had wonderful food and excellent service. I was impressed.
It was the first time for me to meet my cousin Michelle as an adult. I had met her as a little girl, but that was many years ago. I also had the opportunity to meet her husband Ray. They both seemed very nice, but we didn't have much of a chance to talk because of the sheer number of us at the restaurant and the fact that my family was at one end of the line of tables and my cousin was at the other end. Still, we managed a little bit of conversation and I gave Michelle my card, so we might get together in the future.
Frank didn't get home until midnight on Friday and he had to pick up Alex from my dad's house. Saturday they went to Merit Badge College at Baylor University. We kept up with each other -- and Jack's progress -- thanks to our cell phones. My sisters-in-law (Susan and Karen) were also driving back home to Texas. We had a lot to keep up with and worry about. I know Frank and I both felt so much better on Sunday when we knew everyone was home safe and sound.
After Merit Badge College, Frank dropped Alex off at home and he went on to Scott & White to compete at the Toastmasters International Division Level Humorous Speech and Evaluation Contest. Frank represented our Toastmasters club, Texas Stars Toastmasters, and did a fine job, although he went over time by 6 seconds and didn't bring home a trophy.
It looks like Jack and Alex may be able to compare scars someday. Today they did one of a series of 2 MRIs to determine when Jack can undergo open-heart surgery. Thanks to what Alex has been through, I understand a lot of what Jack is going through right now. I never expected so much information to be the same (between pediatrics -- especially since Alex was an infant -- and adult cardiology). The nice thing about that was that when my s-i-ls had questions, and they couldn't reach Frank, they could talk to me and I could explain what they were curious about. I always reminded them that I'm just a mom, not a nurse or a doctor, but when I told Frank about our conversations, he told me I did a good job explaining things. :-) That made me feel a lot better. I hate thinking I know just enough to mess things up!
So with all of these family matters going on, it's difficult to find time to work on The Heart of a Father; however, Dad made time this week to completely finish Chapter 1! Frank is writing the connecting material for the book and he sent Dad what he had written. Dad then completed the line and copy editing and feels the first chapter is complete. I still need to give it my stamp of approval and we still have to run it by all of the authors, but it's much closer to being complete than it ever has before! It's very exciting to see the book coming together.
We were trying to do a chapter a week, but things might have to be delayed a bit. Daddy is having eye surgery this week and he may be out of commission for a few days -- as will I since I'm going to help take care of him. It's a pity we don't have unlimited hours to work on finishing the book without interruptions, but that's just not the way life goes.
I hope all of you have a wonderful week. It's going to be another big swimming week for Joey and me. On Thursday we leave for TISCA in Corpus Christi. This is one of the biggest high school meets Joey will take part in. This time they'll have their whole team together and their relays should be a bit different. It should be an exciting meet. I plan to be back in time for Robotics on Sunday.
Meanwhile Frank and Alex will be attending Merit Badge College on Saturday to finish up Alex's merit badges as he strives to become an Eagle Scout. He still has a couple of years to go, but he is working very hard toward that goal.
When I get back from being out of town, I am hopeful we'll have Chapter 2 done. I'll keep you all posted on how that progresses.
Sincerely,
Anna Jaworski
This last week was bittersweet. The bitter came in the form of a phone call at ten minutes 'til one Thursday morning. It was my sister-in-law. My husband's brother, Jack, was in the hospital suffering from a massive heart attack. We didn't know if he'd make it.
By 6:30 a.m. Jack had undergone 2 cardiac caths. He was stabilized and at a different hospital than where he'd started out. Things were looking up for Jack. Frank flew out later Thursday morning to be with him and our sister-in-law Lee.
The sweet part also happened on Thursday. My mother, two aunts and one uncle were visiting my cousin in Waco from Georgia and I was to go to Waco with Alex for lunch. I called to tell them that we'd had hardly any sleep and I was going to be a little bit late. The rest of the late morning and afternoon were spent visiting with my mother, Aunt Guyla, Aunt Paula and Uncle Otis.
Thursday afternoon Alex and I drove back to Temple so we could help out at Joey's swim meet. It was a good meet, although the much bigger team from a much bigger city romped our small team. :-( Still, the kids swam well and made some improvements.
Friday my family came to visit me in Temple. We went to lunch with my father and grandmother. What could have been an awkward event went well. I'm so glad to see my mother and father can be together without animosity. Joey and Megan (my sister's daughter) will be graduating next year and it would be nice if they could both be present for those special occasions.
On Friday night Joey and I left for a swim meet in College Station. This was a huge meet of 499 swimmers from all over (mostly central and south) Texas. Our team only brought 6 boys and 7 girls. Our boys finished 6th beating out much bigger teams! Joey got two best times and his relays helped earn the boys some good points. It was fun to watch Joey and his team do so well. Landry, our only diver, is one of Joey's best friends and I was happy to see him do well in the diving -- especially since this was the first big meet for him to attend and compete in as a diver.
We didn't get home until close to 1 a.m. on Sunday. The weekend was half over. But there was still Robotics to do! The X-Bots came over and worked very hard on their missions for a while before taking a break. During the break I talked to the boys about what they were doing and how to talk to judges about how they were interacting, changing responsibilities for missions, programs and building arms and attachments, and strategizing on the best way for their robot to earn the most points. It was an interesting meeting.
Coach Cristy and I also went over their homework from last week and reminded them about the field trip we're taking on Tuesday to the Families in Crisis center in order to continue working on their community service/robotics project. We got a lot done in 2 hours!
Then it was on to McGregor. This is a small town near Gatesville and not far from Hewitt (where my cousin lives) and Temple (where I live). We went to a restaurant called Luigi's which had wonderful food and excellent service. I was impressed.
It was the first time for me to meet my cousin Michelle as an adult. I had met her as a little girl, but that was many years ago. I also had the opportunity to meet her husband Ray. They both seemed very nice, but we didn't have much of a chance to talk because of the sheer number of us at the restaurant and the fact that my family was at one end of the line of tables and my cousin was at the other end. Still, we managed a little bit of conversation and I gave Michelle my card, so we might get together in the future.
Frank didn't get home until midnight on Friday and he had to pick up Alex from my dad's house. Saturday they went to Merit Badge College at Baylor University. We kept up with each other -- and Jack's progress -- thanks to our cell phones. My sisters-in-law (Susan and Karen) were also driving back home to Texas. We had a lot to keep up with and worry about. I know Frank and I both felt so much better on Sunday when we knew everyone was home safe and sound.
After Merit Badge College, Frank dropped Alex off at home and he went on to Scott & White to compete at the Toastmasters International Division Level Humorous Speech and Evaluation Contest. Frank represented our Toastmasters club, Texas Stars Toastmasters, and did a fine job, although he went over time by 6 seconds and didn't bring home a trophy.
It looks like Jack and Alex may be able to compare scars someday. Today they did one of a series of 2 MRIs to determine when Jack can undergo open-heart surgery. Thanks to what Alex has been through, I understand a lot of what Jack is going through right now. I never expected so much information to be the same (between pediatrics -- especially since Alex was an infant -- and adult cardiology). The nice thing about that was that when my s-i-ls had questions, and they couldn't reach Frank, they could talk to me and I could explain what they were curious about. I always reminded them that I'm just a mom, not a nurse or a doctor, but when I told Frank about our conversations, he told me I did a good job explaining things. :-) That made me feel a lot better. I hate thinking I know just enough to mess things up!
So with all of these family matters going on, it's difficult to find time to work on The Heart of a Father; however, Dad made time this week to completely finish Chapter 1! Frank is writing the connecting material for the book and he sent Dad what he had written. Dad then completed the line and copy editing and feels the first chapter is complete. I still need to give it my stamp of approval and we still have to run it by all of the authors, but it's much closer to being complete than it ever has before! It's very exciting to see the book coming together.
We were trying to do a chapter a week, but things might have to be delayed a bit. Daddy is having eye surgery this week and he may be out of commission for a few days -- as will I since I'm going to help take care of him. It's a pity we don't have unlimited hours to work on finishing the book without interruptions, but that's just not the way life goes.
I hope all of you have a wonderful week. It's going to be another big swimming week for Joey and me. On Thursday we leave for TISCA in Corpus Christi. This is one of the biggest high school meets Joey will take part in. This time they'll have their whole team together and their relays should be a bit different. It should be an exciting meet. I plan to be back in time for Robotics on Sunday.
Meanwhile Frank and Alex will be attending Merit Badge College on Saturday to finish up Alex's merit badges as he strives to become an Eagle Scout. He still has a couple of years to go, but he is working very hard toward that goal.
When I get back from being out of town, I am hopeful we'll have Chapter 2 done. I'll keep you all posted on how that progresses.
Sincerely,
Anna Jaworski
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